Thursday, September 15, 2016
"Marriage is a drag. Remember all the fun and freedom you had when you were single?"
"You're not a complete woman unless you have children. What's a couple of tens of thousands of dollars as long as you get a baby?"
"Kids have stolen your life. Is it too much to ask to have a few free days to yourself?"
"You're only 45 minutes late. She'll understand and the kids are too little to notice. How else will you afford this lifestyle if you bow out on work every time your wife needs a little help at home?"
"You'll only resent this job more and more if you don't get out of here right now. You've worked so hard, and this stress is over the top. A couple of beers will help you get to where you need to be so you can go home and help with a good attitude."
"That cake is exactly what you need to deal with the day you've had."
"Hey fatty, if you'd just skip food for 2 days, you could finally fit in that dress you used to wear."
"Those $200 shoes are what you need to perform at your best."
"Don't even think about going to Jesus. All he'll want to do is steal your soul and whisper things in your ear."